Yayyyy for Yardwork!!

Well, who does yardwork over the weekend in the brutal heat? ME, that's who!!! Ok, I wish I could say that I did everything this weekend but the truth is I have been working on my landscaping project in the front for the past couple of months. Ahhh, the joy of being a homeowner and making home improvements.

These are the yucca plants that I pulled up in May.
They were a pain in booty to remove....
I am glad they are gone and if I miss them too much there are still some in the backyard.

Out with the old & in with the new.

In June, I planted six box woods that will stay nice & green year round.

  

Finally, in July I finished my project.
Better late than never. This weekend I added the rock. I love it!

Just call me DEEBO!!!

Today's conversation at the pool:

Me: Is your bottled water hot?
Eve: Yea, it is.
Me: Oh, mine's not.
Eve: Danggg Deebo!!! You're getting worse!! *laughing

Now, those of you reading this blog and saying, "Who's Deebo?"  Well, if you have seen the movie FRIDAY then you have seen the character Deebo. My friend, Eve, has started calling me Deebo because she says I can be a little dominating at times like the character in the movie.  Now, I love my girl so when she calls me 'Deebo'  I take no offense. In fact, I then proceed to play the part of puffing up my chest, snapping my fingers, rolling my neck, and acting all tough-- straight up, being a bit of a bully. So, it's our ongoing joke that she thinks I can be a little much at times. Anyways, today's pool event made me chuckle but more than that it made me think....

Well, this weekend it really became reality that I am Deebo when my beau told me, 'quit bossing me around all the time'. At first, I went straight in to Deebo mode. Seriously, how are you going to tell me, sweet little me, that I need to quit being bossy? So, I got mad and copped an attitude for a long time until we both forgot about it and I didn't even really think about it again until today when Deebo reappeared at the pool.

It's always been in my nature to be very dominating. I am very independent and I have worked extremely hard to get where I am -- let me tell you, it did not come by being a push over. It came from being opinionated, strong minded and yes, maybe at times, a little Deebo-ish.  I never really cared about what anyone thought when they commented on my dominating ways but weirdishly enough it bothers me now. (I guess that means-- I like him, huh?) It's something I need to work on. Now, I'm not saying I'm going to be somebody I'm not but what I am saying is that I am going to make a conscious effort of when it is and isn't okay to let out my inner Deebo.

This Is Me....

I'm a fairly simple person.  I love to laugh. I love being silly.  It's truly the little things in life that I live for.  My path in life is led by my mind rather than my heart. If you can read my mind you can win my heart...eventually.

I am a creature of habit. I cuss way too much and drive way too fast.  I always wait until I'm on my last ounce of gas before I fill up. I procrastinate on everything and then kick my own booty for doing it.  The cycle still continues....I never learn my lesson.   I prefer wheat bread to white and strawberry soda to any other.  Gojos is my favorite restaurant.   I always order the steak and shrimp. I don't know if it's really steak that I'm getting but it taste good and that's enough for me.

I love what I do for a living. I believe the children are our future.  I love kids because I am a kid. I think I'm smart about some things; however, I never voice myself. I am truly fascinated by the human mind.  I absolutely hate standardized testing. I have a problem with constantly second guessing myself with shit that I'm educated in and I am very educated. I am very self-sufficiant. I am very ambitious. I have a serious problem with thinking about really random shit. Weird things fascinate me. 

I enjoy people watching.  I enjoy watching people's mannerisms.  I get extremely shy around people I don't know for whatever reasons.   I can be really stubborn at times, sometimes even act like a baby. I am extremely tight with spending money on myself but love spending it on other people. I live for the coupons in the Sunday paper and the summertime garage sales. I am a total bargain shopper. I can be "hood" at times but get extremely mad when someone tries to call me on it.   I hate it when people try to act like they know me.  I hate it when people judge me.

I think golf is super boring but still would like to learn to play.   I think I'm good at video games when in reality...I'm awful! I think football rocks. I get pissed when people talk about the Chiefs and have for as long as I can remember.   I love my city--Kansas City.

I constantly make other people's problems my own.  I worry way too much about everything and anything. I am currently teaching myself not to worry about the things I can't control. My new motto is "Don't sweat the small stuff". It's not working so well. I constantly overload myself with jobs. I wish I had someone to take out my trash, grade my papers and do my laundry but will never ask for help with even the smallest task.

Sometimes I laugh when bad things happen to other people and then feel guilty about it later.   Sometimes, I never feel guilty.  I love pulling practical jokes on people.  I have such a dry sense of humor.   I once laughed at my brother for falling down a flight of stairs.  He lived*.  Clowns scare the shit out of me and I'm horrified of spiders. Hot baths, music, books and long intimate conversations keep me sane. I live everyday for myself and not for anyone else. I like to impress people, but I'm not easily impressed. I am often mistaken for a b*tch but to truly know me is to truly love me.   I believe in GOD, always being real to yourself, and music.  The rest is to be continued...

Change Is Good.

A few months back, I decided I needed a change in my career. I didn't really know what all that encompassed but I knew it was a done deal in my mind. After a few months full of high anxiety fretting over what was the best decision for myself, I accepted a position teaching first grade in another building. As sad, as it is leaving the school, the friends, the familiarity of what I have had for the past six years I am excited for the change and the growth that is in my future.  Change can be a good thing :)

I had no clue that packing up my classroom would be so much work.
It has been really overwhelming.

Out with the old and in with the new.  My stuff has been moved.
Let the unpacking and the new adventure begin...



A Complete Stranger.

The past couple weeks have been tough. Real tough. I've been in a real funk. I've felt so lost. And yet, there's wasn't any explanation.  Until, this morning, when it hit me like a brick. So many changes have happened since last summer and it has finally caught up with me. Today, I realized that I am having a mid-life crisis or something of that nature. My world is not my world anymore. The truth is, there's a stranger in my house and her name is ME.

The words to write haven't been there because I didn't know what was bothering me. Now I do--Who is the person that I have become? I say this, like a it's a bad thing. Truth is, from the looks of things. Things are dandy. But I feel so empty inside.

Since last summer, I have bought a house. Fixed the house. Paid off debt, Strengthened my relationship w/God. Committed to a relationship. And made a ballsy career moves. I am stable. I am secure. Life is grand.... Wait, but is it????

Truth-- I feel like I don't know myself anymore. Without me even realizing it--my world changed dramatically. I feel like I just woke up from a dream but this is my reality.  These motions I go through every day don't feel like ME they feel like just that... motions. Everything is the same every stinkin day...Is this what 'growing up' feels like???


I blinked for a second and 12 months went by and now I'm a completely different person. A complete stranger. Is this the next chapter of my life? Because if so--we can skip it.